After 9 months of answering the same questions or smiling at the same comments, I don't want to listen to it anymore. I would like to grocery shop without hearing how cute my belly is or being told by a complete stranger that they just had to get an epidural because they were in that much pain.
I'm really pregnant. Really tired. Really sore. This means I'm really cranky and can snap at any given moment.
I once thanked the cashier at Arby's for noticing my misery and for not telling me how cute my belly is.
Things I don't want to hear at 9 months pregnant:
1) "oh you're adorable" Glad you think so. Now stfu before I smack you!
2) "when are you do?" When does it effing look like?
3) "do you know what you're having?" Yeah, a human.
4) "is this your first?" Yes, I just like grocery shopping with other people's children.
5) "how are you feeling?" Fan-f***ing-tastic.
6) "are you going to do it naturally or get an epidural?" Like it's any of your freaking business!
7) "oh you're getting close!" Thank you Captain Obvious.
8) "how many more are you going to have?" Really?
9) "have you had that baby yet?" Yes, that's why I look like I stuffed a beach ball under my shirt.
10) Any stories about why you couldn't do it naturally or how long you were in labor for. And any questions, concerns and stories as to my choice in getting permanent birth control.
No comments:
Post a Comment